Standing Still

I haven't "blogged" in a while.
I've tried. I've written a few things I thought sounded "kinda good," however, I started this blog to be honest about where I am in my life and what is new to me...
I could put a hundred "good" posts here, but the reality is I haven't written because
what is new to me is?

Hormones and baby blues.

Man, I can't say I've experienced anything like this. I'm generally a very steady person. I don't tend to swing to extremes, I don't get my feelings hurt easily and wouldn't describe myself as sensitive; until now.
I'll save you my whining and complaining and get to the heart of my main issue and why I'm having such a difficult time.

My issue is standing still.

I am a fixer. I literally believe in the core of my being that I can fix anything. That I can "make anything happen." Maybe I watched too many after school specials growing up, or maybe it's coming from two strong-willed, independent parents, but that's me.
Phrases like:
"When the going gets tough, the tough get going."
"The Lord helps those, who help them self."
are etched into the crevasses of my brain.

What is new to me is a verse I read about two weeks ago, but in my post- pardum brain just clicked today.
Exodus 14:14- "THE LORD WILL FIGHT FOR YOU, YOU NEED ONLY BE STILL." (Or some translations say Be Silent.- either way both are difficult!)

What didn't click til today is that being still is not doing nothing. Standing still is an ACTION. It takes a lot of concentration and focus to stand still, especially for this fixer!

In Exodus 14 the Israelites had come to the Red Sea and Pharaoh's Army had "chased" after them. As they stood at the river and saw his army approaching they lost it. They turned on Moses and blamed him for leading them to their death. Their "fix" would have been to return to slavery! How short sighted and how small was their god! This same GOD HAD JUST sent 10 plagues through Egypt demonstrating His power, but Fear set in and they were choosing SLAVERY. The very thing they had been begging delivery from for almost 400 years!
Thankfully, God had the voice of Moses to tell the people to "Fear Not! Stand by and see the salvation of the Lord which He will accomplish for you today..." And then God told them to go forward. Into the Sea, which He parted for them. They crossed and watched as Pharaoh and his army were destroyed.

It is so easy to read this scripture and identify with Moses. To say- "how stupid are the Israelites!" But- REALITY CHECK! I'm the Israelite! I'm the stupid one trying to "fix" things myself. I'm the one loosing sight of the power and deliverance of my God. He doesn't make it difficult for us. We just have to get ourselves out of the way. I have to get myself out of the way!

Lord, give me the strength to stop fixing things and the power to stand still.